4 Month Sleep Regressions
Anyone who’s been a parent of a newborn can tell you that one of the toughest stretches of time is the 4 month sleep regression. Everyone is even more sleep deprived than usual. Maybe your baby isn’t taking great naps, or struggling with feedings because they seem distracted. There are a multitude of things that become increasingly more difficult the more tired and cranky you all get due to lack of sleep!
What is a 4 month sleep regression?
Right around the 13-22 week mark, you might notice that your precious bundle of joy who was only waking up once during the night for a quick feeding is suddenly wide awake well past what you thought was their bedtime. Or, perhaps you finally got your baby to sleep, had a successful transition to their own crib or bassinet, and within the hour they’re up and crying. Screaming. Hyperventilating. This, my friends, is the 4 month sleep regression in action - disrupted sleep patterns, sporadic and interrupted feedings, and overall crankiness and discomfort for everyone involved.
What causes a 4 month sleep regression?
Developmentally, a sleep regression at 3-4 months is completely normal. This is the time where your baby begins to notice the world around them, and as a result they are fully focused on every little sight, sound, and sensation they’re experiencing for the first time. This explains the interrupted and shorter feedings through the day - watching a sibling play with their toys or that flashing light box on the wall that’s on during feedings is A LOT more exciting than eating!
As a result, when a baby wakes up during the 4 month sleep regression and they start crying, they may actually be hungry! They may also just be fussy or noticing that their environment has changed - they’ve gone from a pair of warm, snuggly arms to a flat, chilly mattress. With their newfound awareness, this can be startling.
This often leads to more naps during the day (because - of course - they’re tired!) and less feedings. High-calorie fill-me-up feedings start happening later and later, and eventually it feels like your entire days are backwards. Sleep in the daylight, up in the dark. We call this reverse cycling, and it’s something you want to try and avoid falling into if you can. We’ll discuss how a little later on.
What are the signs of 4 month sleep regression?
As mentioned above, some of the biggest signs to watch for right around the 4 month mark are a shift in sleep patterns at night and interrupted, distracted, or shorter feedings during the day. There are also some other things to keep an eye out for, including:
Your baby is starting to come out of their swaddle, thus waking them up. If you have a burrito baby who’s starting to roll or at least show signs they’re on their way, a swaddle is something that could actually be restricting and hindering their comfy sleep. In addition, you want a baby who can roll to be able to use their arms while sleeping for safety. Try a transition swaddle or sleep sack and see if that helps your baby catch some Z’s.
Increased crying or fussiness upon waking is another telltale sign, especially if your baby is usually pretty happy when they first wake up.
Trouble falling asleep, even when being rocked or held. Most babies, especially if they are used to being rocked or held when falling asleep, will usually slip into slumber pretty fast. When your baby starts to “fight it”, that’s a good sign sleep regression is right around the corner. Again, this can be attributed to normal, healthy, developmental changes. However, it certainly does not make this tricky time any easier for them, you, or anyone else in your household!
What can you do to make it through the 4 month sleep regression?
While there’s no way to prevent the 4 month sleep regression from happening completely, there are certainly some tips and tricks to managing it (or at the very least, making it through safely and with some sanity intact!)
Keep bedtime consistent, predictable, and routine - establish what bedtime looks like for your little one early on, even if they’re not aware they’re going through the motions yet. Once they hit that 4 month mark, the cues you’ve put in place long before should help to signal to them it’s time to wind down. Bedtime feedings, pajamas, songs, books - all things to help your baby take cues from their environment and slip into dreamland.
Keep your baby rested - while it may seem counterintuitive, it’s proven that overtired babies have a harder time settling down at night. You’d think if you kept them up more during the daytime they’d have no problem hitting the hay. This is not the case for most, and although you don’t want your baby sleeping ALL day to prevent reverse cycling, you certainly want to give them a little extra naptime if they’ve been struggling to sleep at night.
3. Keep your cool - easier said than done, we know. When everyone is crying because no one is sleeping, it’s hard to feel like you’re calm, cool, and collected (or that you ever will be again!) When your baby wakes up in the wee hours and starts screaming, it can be hard to not want to run right in and scoop them up, if for nothing else than to stop them from crying. The stress you feel is directly transferred to your baby, so if you need an extra beat or two to collect yourself before you go in, your baby will be okay for an extra few moments.
4. Keep feedings for food - it’s easy when it’s 2am and the baby has been up four times already to pop a bottle or a breast in their mouth to satisfy them for a bit.
While most babies at this age will still require a nighttime feeding or two for sure, if they get more feedings during regression, they may become accustomed to it and expect more feedings even after you’ve made it through regression. Soothing them in other ways (walking, rocking, bouncing, swinging, snuggling, teething toys, pacifiers, singing - anything and everything is fair game!) may be enough to get them to sleep, and if not they may actually be hungry!
5. Keep yourself healthy and sane - If you have a partner or a support person who can help with nighttime duty, make sure you’re not shouldering the load alone. If you don’t have someone at the home that can help, hiring a doula may be an option for you! Lean on your supports - this is not easy, but with everything that isn’t easy, it will come to and end and you will make it through.
If you want to talk more about what a doula can do to support you and your family through a 4 month sleep regression, reach out! We’d love to talk, strategize, and support where we can!
