Choosing A Doula - 10 Questions To Ask

We’ve covered what a doula is. We’ve covered how a doula, digital or traditional, can help you during your pregnancy, birth, and during your 4th trimester. We’ve even covered some additional services a Doula would be able to do, such as placenta encapsulation. 

But how do you choose a doula? Where do you even start? How do you know if your doula is the right one for you? 

Here are 10 questions that everyone should ask their doula when trying to decide if they’re the right fit for your pregnancy journey:

How would you describe your doula style?

Do you want a doula that is accessible 24/7, or do you need a little more space? Do you want someone who will be rubbing your back during labor or someone to keep others from touching you? How do they advocate for their clients needs and wants during labor when they can’t advocate for themselves? Making sure you find a doula that matches your energy, personality, and will be able to meet your needs is critical for both you and your doula.

Do you have a back up doula? If so, may I meet them?

Most doulas have a back up doula in the event there are multiple births within the same amount of time. It is always okay to ask to meet the back up doula - you have to make sure their style matches yours as well! 

May I email/text/call you with questions?

Some doulas are okay with around the clock communication, while some prefer to keep it in a certain time frame or by appointment only. It’s always good to ask and know what boundaries and norms are acceptable when choosing your doula.

Do you have a time limit on long births?

Some doulas have a 12 hour clause on their services offered. After that, you usually end up paying their hourly rate. Some will stay for the whole birth regardless of how long it’s been, while some will call in a back up doula or take a break. Some will continue to be accessible, but only digitally. Some doulas are only digital and you’ll never meet them face to face. Make sure you get a clear idea of what your doula is willing to do if you have a prolonged birth.

What are your tactics for pain? How do you feel about pain medication or epidurals?

If you are looking for a fully unmedicated birth, that’s good for your doula to know. Conversely, if your birth plan includes an epidural or pain medication, that is also good for your doula to know. There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to medication, and you want to make sure you have a doula who supports your choice and will be able to assist you in advocating for whatever you need at the moment. 

How many births have you attended?

Obviously, a doula with a high number after this question is someone with a lot of experience. That being said, you could be missing some real gems if you base your choice solely off the number of births attended. Number of births attended is one component in a whole picture of who your doula is.

Why did you become a doula?

This is a question that is a lot more touchy-feely than some decide they need when choosing a doula. However, if you ask doulas about their why, you can get a glimpse into what drives them to do this work. It’s an open-ended question that often brings up a lot of great reasons, and of those great reasons, you will find your answer to why this doula matches you.

What kind of training do you have? What organization are you trained through?

There are a number of different places in which you can get a doula certification. Much like the question “which college did you go to?” some folks choose their doula based on which program they completed. One of the important things to pay attention to when asking this question is not only what the answer is, but how your prospective doula answers. If there is a lot of emphasis on the titles and credentials, that may be off putting for some. If they hone in on the skills and abilities learned while at their program, that may be a lot more telling than where they completed their studies. 

Do you offer postpartum care and follow up, and if so does that cost an additional fee?

Some doulas are pregnancy only. Some are only birth doulas, who arrive when you go into labor and end once the baby is safely earth side. Some doulas only offer postpartum care - late night feeding, changing, assistance with nursing. You’ll want to make sure your doula offers all of the services you’re looking for prior to committing.

What are your package fees? What happens if the birth I planned on drastically changes? Do your fees change?

This is an important question to ask your doula early on in the selection process. Money is a factor, and you want to make sure that both you and your doula are aware of your budget, financial limits, and any potential changes to fees either way. All possible scenarios in which price changes or refunds are a possibility are good to walk through with your prospective doula so you feel like all angles are covered and surprises are limited.

The most important thing to remember when choosing your doula is that they are there to support you, whatever that may look like. One of the best ways to get the real idea of your doula is to read their reviews. You can always ask your doula or a previous client for reviews, or most doulas have a place online where you can read reviews at your leisure. You can find reviews for our doulas at Beautiful Births and Beyond here, or schedule a consultation today to start finding your perfect fit doula.